Medical Anxiety


I always grew up thinking that our bodies would tell us when there is something seriously wrong. With breast cancer you can find a physical lump, with a stoke you get numbness on your left side etc. by default, I assumed that you would know you have cancer. When my mum was diagnosed, she wasn’t even going to go to the doctor. She has the faintest of pain in her shoulder. It was only because she had a history of blood clots in her family that the doctor even ran a blood test and sent her to the hospital.

Knowing this now, it’s scary to me. It was such a small thing that most people would put down to a muscle pain and leave it. Now every new ache or pain I get, I end up with severe anxiety thinking I’m next. Though covid I had what I assumed was the same symptoms as mum did and I had a full blown meltdown. I didn’t sleep, I was waking my fiancé up every hour because I was scared I was going to die if I closed my eyes. The feeling that if I went to sleep, I would never wake up again. I know there is no “normal” after loosing someone you love, so there is no point in me asking “is this normal?”. But I guess my question is, has anyone experienced this? And what did you do to help cope with being so scared over such small things.